— Where reality is relative —
Poor planning on your part does not necessitate an emergency on mine. — Bob Carter;
Could’a, would’a, should’a … that’s me
The greatest enemy of knowledge is not ignorance, it is the illusion of knowledge — Stephen Hawking #RIP
He is all of them. And he is one of us.
They can’t even. They lose all ability to can.
Questions are easy, it is the answers that are hard
Nobody notices what I do until I don’t do it
A person is smart, people are stupid
ASAP means As Soon As Possible, not Right &#^ing Now!
Code is poetry
In the end, you only regret the chances you didn’t take.
Perseverance, the secret of all triumphs — Victor Hugo
In computer science, there are only two hard problems: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.
So dumb he can’t fart and chew gum at the same time — Lyndon Johnson, on Ford
Working on it …
In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is — Jan L. A. van de Snepscheut
You can never have enough of too much
We are so creative that when we have no problems, we invent them. — Augusto Cury
There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works — Alan J. Perlis
If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one? — Abraham Lincoln
Dumb as a bucket of rocks
Quantity has a quality all of its own — Joseph Stalin
If it’s a good idea, go ahead and do it. It is much easier to apologize than it is to get permission — Grace Hopper
The grass is ALWAYS greener on the other side of the fence, but there is also always cow shit in the grass somewhere
Should I shut up now?
For all that they did, and for all they were never able to do, we remember. Lest We Forget
One of these days I’m gunna climb that mountain
« A life is like a garden. Perfect moments can be had, but not preserved, except in memory. LLAP — Leonard Nimoy aka Spock »
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APEC is bigger than all of us – Australia, the U.S. and Malaysia and Dr. Mahathir and any other recalcitrants.Paul Keating
What we have got is a dead carcass, swinging in the breeze, but nobody will cut it down to replace him.Paul Keating
I was nearly chloroformed by the performance of the Honorable Member for Mackellar. It nearly put me right out for the afternoon.Paul Keating
The thing about poor old Costello is he is all tip and no iceberg.Paul Keating
I was profoundly embarrassed by it and did all I could to change it.Gough Whitlam
Those opposite could not operate a tart shopPaul Keating
Soon we will be at the stage where he will be offering us a free set of steak knives.Paul Keating
That you Jim? Paul Keating here. Just because you swallowed a fucking dictionary when you were about 15 doesn’t give you the right to pour a bucket of shit over the rest of us.Paul Keating
I’ve never said I’m immortal. I do believe in correct language. I’m eternal; I’m not immortal.Gough Whitlam
(His performance) is like being flogged with a warm lettuce.Paul Keating
The little desiccated coconut is under pressure and he is attacking anything he can get his hands onPaul Keating
The punters know that the horse named Morality rarely gets past the post, whereas the nag named Self-interest always runs a good race.Gough Whitlam
Mr Speaker can I have some protection from the clowns on the front bench?Paul Keating
The accounts do show that Australia is in a recession. The most important thing about that is, is that this is the recession that Australia had to have.Paul Keating
I have more influence now than when I had the powerGough Whitlam
You had an important place in Australian society on the ABC and you gave it up to be a pop star…with a big cheque…and now you’re on to this sort of stuff. That shows what a 24 carat pissant you are, Richard, that’s for sure.Paul Keating
Let me make quite clear that I am for abortion and, in your case Sir, we should make it retrospective.Gough Whitlam
When government makes opportunities for any of the citizens, it makes them for all the citizens. We are all diminished as citizens when any of us are poor. Poverty is a national waste as well as individual waste. We are all diminished when any of us are denied proper education. The nation is the poorer – a poorer economy, a poorer civilisation, because of this human and national waste.Gough Whitlam
He’s the greatest L plater of all time.Paul Keating
My great objective as a parliamentarian was to dramatise the deficiencies and devise practical government programs to deal with them. It was a cause that went to the heart of our way of life.Gough Whitlam
He is lofty, and I am eminent.Gough Whitlam
I suppose that the Honourable Gentleman’s hair, like his intellect, will recede into the darkness.Paul Keating
Maintain your rage and enthusiasm for the campaign for the election now to be held and until polling day.Gough Whitlam
The Honorable Member has been in so many parties he is a complete political harlot.Paul Keating
Can a soufflé rise twice?Paul Keating
We’re not interested in the views of painted, perfumed gigolos.Paul Keating
Well may we say ‘God save the Queen’, because nothing will save the Governor-General! The Proclamation which you have just heard read by the Governor-General’s Official Secretary was countersigned Malcolm Fraser, who will undoubtedly go down in Australian history from Remembrance Day 1975 as Kerr’s cur.Gough Whitlam
You boxhead you wouldn’t know. You are flat out counting past ten.Paul Keating
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