Archive

Archive of : August, 2011

Harlequin Novel Updated – 2011

He grasped me firmly, but gently, just above my elbow and guided me into a room, his room. Then he quietly shut the door and we were alone. He approached me soundlessly from behind, and spoke in a low, reassuring voice close to my ear, “Just relax.” Without warning,...

How About Some Money?

He had had quite a night: wining and dining, followed by love-making all night long. As he prepared to leave the next morning, she rolled over and asked, “Darling, before you go, how about some money?” He sheepishly replied, “You’ve done enough for me already. I’ll just grab a...

Redneck Honeymoon

A redneck couple had just been married and went to an expensive hotel for their honeymoon. The man went to the front desk and asked for a room, saying, “This is a very special ‘casion. It’s our weddin’ night and we need your BEST room with a strong bed.”...

Cops?

Two girlfriends were speeding down the highway at well over 90 mph. “Hey,” asked the brunette at the wheel, “Any cops following us?” The blonde turned around and had a long look at the road behind them. “Yeah, looks like it.” “Are his flashers on?” asked the brunette The...

Breakthrough?

Millions of years ago, there was no such thing as the wheel. The only way to move things was by carrying or dragging. One day, some primitive guys were watching their wives drag a dead mastodon to the food preparation area. It was exhausting work. The guys were getting...

Thanks!

Smith goes to see his supervisor in the front office. “Boss,” he says, “we’re doing some heavy house-cleaning at home tomorrow, and my wife needs me to help with the attic and the garage, moving and hauling stuff.” “We’re short-handed, Smith,” the boss replies. “I can’t give you the...

Beware of the parrot

This postman is working on a new beat. He comes to a garden gate marked BEWARE OF THE PARROT! He looks down the garden and, sure enough, there’s a parrot sitting on its perch. He has a little chuckle to himself at the sign and the parrot there on...

Blonde airways

It was mealtime during a flight on Blonde Airlines. “Would you like dinner?” the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. “What are my choices?” John asked. “Yes or no,” she replied.

Favorites

My teacher asked what was our favourite animal. I said, “Fried chicken.” She said I wasn’t funny, but she was wrong because everyone else laughed. She sent me to the principals office. When I told him what happened, he laughed, too; but said not to do it again. I...

Coke machine

A blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke. The blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins. She returns and starts feeding the machine madly and, of course, the machine keeps feeding out drinks. Another woman walks...