Archive

Archive of : March, 2011

Revenge

A man was reading the paper when an ad caught his eye. It loudly

Bikie

A bikie was visiting the zoo when he noticed a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabbed her and tried to pull her inside. As the child’s parents stood screaming, the bikie leaped to the cage, and, with a powerful punch, hit the lion right...

Voodoo dick

There was this businessman who was getting ready to go on a long business trip. He knew his wife was a flirtatious sort, so he thought he’d try to get her something to keep her occupied while he was gone, because he didn’t much like the idea of her...

The Circulation of the Blood

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said, “Now, boys, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it and I should turn red in the face.” “Yes, sir,” the boys...

Doesn’t this make your job seem better?

A C-141 transport aircraft was preparing for departure from a base in Thule, Greenland. They had been waiting for the truck to arrive to pump out the aircraft’s sewage holding tank. The Aircraft Commander was in a hurry, the truck was late in arriving, and the Airman performing the...

The Catalogue

Two Irish men were looking at a mail order catalogue and admiring the models. Paddy says to Mick, “Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalogue?” “Yes,” Mick replies, “they are very beautiful. And look at the price!” Paddy says with wide eyes, “Wow! They aren’t very expensive!...

Think of the children

A ninety-year-old couple decide to get a divorce. They go to the judge and say, “Judge, we want a divorce.” The judge says, “You’ve been married 70 years and now you want to get a divorce? Why did you wait so long?” The couple say in unison, “Well, we...

Wife’s birthday present

A married man was talking about birthdays. He said to his friend, “I

Shoot for the moon

Two blondes are vacationing in Australia. One blonde asks the other, “Which is further, London or the Moon?” The other replies, “Helloooo, can you see London from here???”

Hello!!?

Mujibar was trying to get into Australia legally through Immigration. The Immigration Officer said, “Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it you cannot enter Australia.” Mujibar said, “I am ready.” The officer said, “Make a sentence using the words yellow, pink and green.”...